all good things must come to an end

I've been a terrible blogger lately.

And I'm not even going to apologize.

I've also been a terrible housekeeper, awful grocery shopper, and pretty horrendous cook (in fact.. my dear husband told me last night that our supper tasted like Catholic communion hosts... Now, we're all about the Body of Christ around here, but somehow I just don't think that was a compliment...)

And I'm not apologizing for any of those either.

Why? Because I was hoping that for the past few weeks, at the end of the day, if nothing more my kids and I could say I was a good and fun mom. See.. we were on Christmas break. And sometimes spending long afternoons cuddled on the couch, snuggling with my boys, reading about the adventures of Jack and Annie in their Magic Tree House and smiling as they pleaded for "just one more, Mommy," Not one more page, or one more chapter.. one more entire book, :) is more important than writing a fabulous blog post for the day. And sometimes (okay.. ALWAYS) bundling in 10 layers of winter gear to go sledding in the backyard with the boys during Ella's nap time is way more exciting than doing the dishes. And even though there are piles of laundry (clean and dirty) threatening to take over our house at any moment, what does one more game of UNO or deer hunting hurt? (In deer hunting, the boys pretend to be deer and I get to shoot them with Nerf guns.. it's pretty much a win-win.)

But yesterday was back to school. And we started it out with a bang. Driving Nolan 25 miles round trip to school, then rushing home to give Ella a quick breakfast, taking off again to drive Charlie 17 miles in the opposite direction to his school, loading Ella up again for a "quick" trip to Target before our IFSP meeting, which was apparently not quick enough since we showed up 10 minutes late to the meeting that I already had to have everyone reschedule at the last minute after I realized I double booked it and Ella's 2 year check up for the same date, same time, in cities almost an hour apart. (Yes.. we drive a lot..) Oops. I did and will apologize for that one.. Sorry!

Goodbye days of lounging in our pajamas all day... I miss you already! *Sigh.

But back to the IFSP.. I know these kind of meetings can be hard. I know they can be emotionally draining. I know it can be difficult to be forced to confront goals your child has not met, additional services they may need, and sometimes having to fight tooth and nail to get those services. I am thankful that we have a wonderful group of therapists and coordinators who I really feel have Ella's best interests at heart. I feel fortunate to have never had a bad experience with them and love that they do a great job of focusing on the goals Ella has met and how far she's come.

But yesterday? They didn't really need to say much. Ella pretty much told the story by herself.

We started out addressing the not-so-long ago goals of Ella eating more foods orally, different textures and temperatures, drinking more fluids, and getting rid of the NG tube. Meanwhile, Ella sat on my lap, devouring an entire NutraGrain bar and a bag of fruit snacks, all the while taking ample swigs from my jug of iced lemon water. When we talked about her ability to learn sign language, she was fluently asking for "more" food, a "drink" when she was thirsty, and signaling "all done" when her food supply had woefully run out. As we moved on to social interaction, Ella showed off by waving and smiling at the therapists, knowing exactly how to get and hold their attention, and while we were discussing the old PT goals of Ella being able to move across the room 10 feet, she was crawling on all fours around our chairs, exploring all the exciting new toys this room had to offer, such as the ever-enticing outlet boxes and electrical cords.. As we observed a previous goal of being able to choose between 2 different objects, Ella was digging in the diaper bag, pulling out a pair of boots, kicking her shoes off and holding her foot up for me to place them on. And finally, as we examined her cognitive skills, Ella was feeding her baby a bottle, giving her kisses, and ticking the baby's tummy, then showing us her own tummy.

Check, check, check and double check. I'd say she's made some progress.

I am so happy with how far she's come and I am beyond excited for her to meet her next goals.. Walking across the room unassisted, getting into a standing position from the floor, saying 5 words (that was actually an unmet goal from last time that carried over :( ) and adding 5 more signs (she currently does about 6).

And while I am not one to wish away my todays in anticipation of the wishful prospect of an "easier," albeit distant future.. the past few mornings as I've listened to my alarm clock shrieking in pain at the indignity of being set before dawn , grudgingly left the warmth of my cozy bed for the bitter cold of a Nebraska winter, and exchanged "real" clothes for my oh-so-comfy pajamas, I can only think..  there may or may not be 129 days until Summer Vacation.. Just sayin'.